Writing competion

Snow was spreading across the white winter wonderland, it was as cold as dry ice. The river was frozen solid .

Hi this week I was  doing this 


The polar bear was as white as a marshmallow, and as fluffy and shaving cream. It was standing on the edge of the slippery slimy snow land. The turtle was as green as grass . The penguins were really small with a thick coat .
 The trees were as big as 10 story buildings . Behind the tall trees there was a small village filled with cute cosy cottages . The light was as bright as this sparkling shiny sun .
 The man was wearing a dark navy coat, with along with a long leather walking stick by his side . And also a tall black hat that was as black as coal .
 The river was frozen solid and as cold as ice . If you touch it, it will burn you like getting burnt from a fire . The grass was cold, crunchy and chilly . It was like blades of crystals . The broken brisley branches was swaying in the wind like a huge tornado . The branches were tumbling down to the icy floor. The man was feeling happy and joyful as he glanced at the snowy land. The soft snowy snowflakes were like cotton buds falling from the bright blue beautiful sky. They were as small as tiny seeds. Behind the tall trees there were humongous hard hidden cave with a whole bunch of cute cuddly curious polar bears with silver silky skin . The thick tree trunks were black like night and long like a snake. It was also damp, wet and soggy because of the slippery, sparkly, snow. The icicles were sharp . They were like the top of a knife. Above all the tall trees was the foggy, cloudy and gross grout grey sky. The sky was turning misty as the fog cleared sway, it was turning into night. As deep dark darkness grew the fluffy foamy clouds floated away leaving the forest creatures go to their homes . By Amber and Liyah

My writing challenge

Hi guys
This week for writing we did a writing challenge about a picture taken from the cockpit of a plane.
we get points for each thing we add I got 59 points how many  points do you think I got?
here is the points chart.

Points system:

You will be awarded 1 point each time you add;

• An interesting adjective (describing word)
• A correctly placed full stop at the end of a sentence

You will be awarded 2 points if you have;

• An opening paragraph that hooks the reader in
• A concluding paragraph that sums up what has been described
• A new paragraph for something you are describing

You will be awarded 5 points each time you add;

• A simile
• A metaphor
• Alliteration over 3 words long (eg lovely, luscious, lemon)

You will be given bonus points for style and adding in how cool I am without disrupting the flow of the story.` I hope you like my work@*@

My horses writing

Hi guys Today I worked on this description about horses Please tell me if you can picture this decryption in your mind. I hope you like it